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.Even after we d thrown theremnants of lunch in a trash bin, we stillwalked side by side without touching.Theback of my hand grazed the back of his,and I thought he d slip his hand into mine, but he didn t.Neither did I.We were botha little awkward and unsure of where westood with one another. Shoot, what time is it? I checkedmy watch. I m going to be late for mymeeting if I don t go back right now.Sorry. I looked up into Jason s eyes, andmy stomach did a little barrel roll.Kind ofan extreme reaction to a simple meeting ofeyes. I ll see you Sunday, then, at the dogpark? I ll text you directions. Sure. The timbre of his voicevibrated through me, making all my girlparts tingle.His smile set off a flutter too.I was crushing way too hard on somebody who was wildly inappropriate for me. Chapter ElevenLike I said, changing my routine ishard for me, and I had to work out a newsequence for how my date with Annawould go.I reviewed what bus I d take toget to the dog park, where the station was,how much change I d need in order toride.I even wrote a list to refer to in caseI got confused.My therapist called theprocess repatterning. I d done all these things before ourfirst date.Of course, that evening hadn tgone according to plan yet ended up betterthan I d ever expected. I kept on track as I went to meetAnna that Sunday, got on the right bus,gave the right change, then stood becauseall the seats were full.I checked the dog sname in the planner on my phone.Baby.Right.I could remember that.As I rode, I ran through possiblescenarios of how the day might go.We dplay with the dog, maybe stop for a bite,then go our separate ways after a fewhours.Or, Anna might offer to drive mehome.Maybe she d come up to myapartment, and we d fool around again.Then I remembered she d have the dog with her, so maybe we d go back to herplace instead.She might make me dinner,and I d stay late watching a movie.We dstart to make out during the movie and endup in her bed.Fantasizing maybes, Ialmost missed my stop and had to dash tothe front of the bus as the driver waspulling away from the curb.I entered the fence of the dog parkand searched for Anna and what the hellwas her dog s name again? As I started tocheck my notes, I heard my name called,and there she was, walking toward me.Anna was always pretty, but in thatmoment she was achingly beautiful.The sun streaked her hair with gold, and thebreeze wafted it around her face.Her eyesshone, and her smile actually hurt to lookat.The fall day was warm enough to gowithout a jacket, so she wore a light bluetank top and cropped pants.Her bare armsand legs and neck were slender and oh sosexy.She held a red leash in one hand.Atthe end of it, a scruffy-looking terrierstrained and panted. Hi.You made it, she greeted mewhen she drew close.As if I would have stood her up.Hah! For a moment, I was tongue-tied and couldn t put two words together.Idropped to a squat in front of the dog. Cute& Boy? Girl? I couldn tremember. Cute dog. Anna knelt too and ruffled the dog sfur. Yeah, she s my baby. Baby, that was its name.I held myhand out, fingers curled so Baby couldsniff me and decide whether she wantedme to touch her, but the pup wasn t shy.She thrust her head against my fist,begging for attention.I scratched betweenher ears, and she dropped belly up on thegrass.I rubbed her stomach. She s so adorable I can t stand it. Anna s voice went high and girly as shegushed over her new pet, but I had toadmit the pup was pretty damn cute.She unhooked the leash from thedog s collar.Immediately, Baby was upon all fours and bounding around us. She reminds me of& One of thosevivid flashes filled my mind.It was mybirthday.I could taste the cake, smell theblown-out candles, feel soft fur and awarm, wiggling puppy. Reminds me ofwhen we got our dog.He was my birthdaypresent. Sweet.I bet you never forgot that birthday. We followed Baby as she darteddown the path, stopping every few feet tosniff spots other dogs had marked and thenleaving her own piss stamp. How was your week? Annaasked. Normal. I tried to think of oneinteresting thing I could tell about, butunless she wanted to hear how I bravelyunclogged a toilet, there wasn t much tosay. What about yours? I lost my car keys and had to makea new set.That made me late for animportant meeting, which didn t look too good.But otherwise I guess I m doingokay.They haven t fired me yet. Do you worry about being fired? She shrugged. I don t know.Mostof the time I know I m doing a good job,but other times I feel like I m skating onthe edge and one mistake will put me inthe reject pile. That s a lot of pressure.Is yourfirm putting it on you, or are you putting iton yourself? She punched my arm. Okay, sensei.I don t need analysis today.I ve alwaysbeen an overachiever.I know I ve got issues about success. Everybody s got issues.Exceptthese guys. I nodded at other people sdogs chasing each other across the grass,nipping and playing like the pack animalsthey were. Uncomplicated, Anna agreed.Shegrabbed my hand. Come on.Let s run. We raced after Baby toward thethrong of dogs catching Frisbees and ballsor playing tug-o-war with their masters.That afternoon was golden
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